The Power of No
No is one of the hardest words in the English language. It is also quite the powerful word – not too shabby for two letters.
When we were two years old, we learned to say NO quite well and we said it often and then over time we have been conditioned since then that NO is a bad word and so we begin to say yes – even when we really mean to say no. We are then refined to be people pleasers and feel quite guilty for when we do say no. When we are trying to get out of doing something, we then resort to all kind of words and language that means no but it’s everything but direct, kind of like this sentence.
We start making excuses of why we cannot spend time with another person, perhaps a person we love and cherish to be in our lives but because we have the difficulty to say no for fear of rejection, we just create another illusion of our world.
Some of the things you can do to help you are when someone is making a request, you can tell them that you need to think about it before you can commit or not.
When you are saying no, you need to be direct and firm but don’t be rude about it. It’s totally ok to say no and not give a reason for why you can’t or don’t want to.
And please, when you do want to say yes, do so but when you say yes when you mean no, you will feel resentful and it will leave you uncomfortable and drain you of your own energy.
Learning to say no is not an easy feat and it will be quite uncomfortable in the beginning but as you are getting more used to it, you will thank yourself for acquiring this skill that came so easily to you when you were 2.