You have this amazing dream of writing a book, starting a business and perhaps even lose some weight. And yet, here we are at the end of May and you’re looking everything, realizing you didn’t get very far.
What are you waiting for?
Are you waiting for the perfect moment?
Are you waiting for until you’ve perfected the skill?
Are you waiting for the moment you feel you’re enough?
Why can’t it be right this very moment?
What is holding you back?
Is it fear of failing? Fear of disappointing yourself or others?
The lack of not knowing how?
Every excuse you make is a bullshit reason for why you are not willing to make your dream, goal or resolution happen.
When is enough, well enough?
How much longer are you willing to just watch others make their own dreams come true while you are still wishing you could?
Here is the truth: You can!
You need to stop making excuses and start taking action – even when the fear is as loud as a damn jet engine.
Fear is just an emotion, just like anger, love, happiness etc. Are you willing to allow the emotion to rule you, or are you willing to decide how you are going to feel and what you are going to do?
I think too often, we forget that we have a choice.
We always have a choice!
When we were kids, we were told we don’t have a choice. We need to follow the rules, do as we are told. We are told to graduate high school, go to college or learn a trade.
We are told that we should be grateful for the job we have and just go on with our mediocre life.
Yes, I said it: MEDIOCRE
Because I know you envision your life to be different. I know that you have dreams and goals that you want to achieve but because you were told you didn’t have a choice, you just let life slip on by.
What if I told you that you are in control of your life, that you have the power to choose what you will or will not do and how you will live?
Choose and Decide!
What’s it going to be? Living your life to the rules of someone else or your own?
If you are ready to make some changes in your life, it’s time for you to choose a path so you can start achieving your dreams and goals with like-minded people!
So, you think that when you work for yourself the money is coming in and you will be rich and all your worries will be taken care of. Being in business isn’t about the money, because if it was why would you leave the job?
You can make amazing money in your job and be utterly and completely miserable. You may love the job at first and wonder how lucky you have been to land such an amazing position that shows off your skills, knowledge, and talents. Some time goes by, a few months, a year or more and you are starting to feel the strain.
The strain of the demands of the job, the lack of validation, the lack of support in the development, growth, and expertise. And you realize that no matter who you work for it is always about the money for them, the bottom line. How many sales can you get in a day or week, and then week after week without burning out? Because in the end, your salary stays the same and you may even have to fight for a raise.
When I decided to be an entrepreneur it was never about the money. Although money is nice and well of course needed for basic survival.
For me being in business means freedom.
Freedom to be who I am, without ever pretending something or someone I am not.
Freedom to always speaking my truth and stand in my own power.
Being in business is about truly doing the things you love because you are so passionate about them that you can’t imagine doing anything else, but you know that you will never truly be able to experience this working for someone else.
I have had several businesses, some didn’t work out and some I am continuing to build. This is the freedom I have, to push myself, to learn and add to my knowledge box and continue my own personal development.
Being in business is about growth!
Every time I started a business it pushed me. It wasn’t like you know a fairytale that started and ended like this:
She had a dream to be in business and decided it would be so and all the money started flowing in and she was changing the world.
No! Being in business is getting your head in the game and realize that there will be times you are ready to quit and go back to the job. Being in business is work on your mindset every single day and every single day you must decide the actions you will take – whether you like it or not.
Being in business isn’t a vacation, it’s learning strategies and adapting the ones that call you. It’s changing and growing as a person and realizing that some of your friends, well they just can’t hang out in your circle anymore. It isn’t anything against those friends, but being in business means surrounding yourself with like-minded people.
The people that yes want to change the world, change how business is done and who without a doubt believe I’m their success. Success is a hard-fucking road, often compared to a roller coaster or climbing a mountain. what it isn’t is a linear path where everything is smooth sailing.
And yet, no matter the hard times, and no matter how many days I wanted to quit, I remind myself of the freedom I desire. To have the ability to live life and work in my business according to my own damn rules without having to worry about what I say because my clients want the real shit. They don’t want me to sugar coat anything – they want to be pushed and know they are supported during the highs and lows. Always!
You see being in business isn’t about the money. It is about helping and supporting others to achieve their dreams and goals. This is what gives me the freedom because I believe everyone can change their life, their world and become the person they want to be.
And don’t get me wrong, money is nice and necessary but please do not believe the illusion that it is about the money.
Every year during this time, I spend time reviewing the year, the good, the bad and the ugly and the super exciting things that happened.
I also spend time planning my dreams and goals for the following year to follow my vision and create the life and business I want to create.
One of the elements that keep me moving is to really look at the lessons that I have learned, because they bring so much insight about whether my dreams are aligned with me, what new actions I will need to take and create my own freedom my way.
I am worthy and deserving of my dream.
This is so huge for me because I think that whatever messages I have received I allowed living in my subconscious. Externally I always believed that I can have my dream and eat my cake. It’s been a year of growth and really stepping up and into the person I am and I want to be. My word for the year was “emerge” but only after I did the work of feeling and enough doing this really come into play for me.
There isn’t a single thing wrong with being of service and earn money doing it.
I think for so long the message of being of service means that well service people don’t make a lot of money and that they shouldn’t because of the value we bring into this world. But here’s the thing, even people of service in coaching and healing deserve to be paid. This is closed tied to lesson #1. I know when I worked as a counselor the underlying message was that counselors don’t make a lot of money. Why the hell not? We are bringing a tremendous amount of value to this earth, so let’s earn that money while we do what we love.
Creating a vision is key
Creating a vision board of what I wanted my life to look like but also how I wanted to serve people helped me focus on the bigger picture. Even with setbacks of not filling a webinar or struggling to bring clients on board, there is a much bigger vision that I am fulfilling. By honoring this vision, not only for myself, I remind myself that someone out there needs to hear what I am sharing, even if they are not able to act this very moment. This requires me to believe 100% in myself and my vision and allows me to be present every day.
Patience is hard but necessary
Patience hasn’t always been my strength but I learned more and more that this is a necessary ingredient to my vision and my purpose. When I am feeling impatient, I simply remind myself of the recovery process of my son after his second liver transplant and it was hard to be patient during this time BUT being patient and persistent in my mindset work has paid off in full.
Your dream won’t happen sitting on the sideline
Dreams are awesome because they give us something to thrive for but the key is really understanding that dreams are earned. Dreams require some planning and total and complete effort in knowing that you are giving it your all because you can taste this dream and by not creating in, well life may just suck. Dreams require you to show up and act.
Surround yourself with like-minded people
If you have big dreams but surround yourself with people who love to complain and feed the victim persona, then odds are your dreams will not come true or they take 10 times longer to happen. By surrounding yourself with like-minded people, you have a much better chance for your dream to happen because the vibrations that you share with the world is positive energy. It’s that whole “If she can do it, so can I” process.
Invest in yourself
This has been so crucial to my learning process this past year. In 2014, I bought several courses because I am really a DIY kind of girl and learn best on my own, and really there isn’t a thing wrong with that. BUT if you really want to move your dream forward and get over the negative mindset and experiences transformation, hiring a coach has really moved me forward not only in life but my own business.
Do it your way
There are so many systems out there that won’t work for everyone and parts of it won’t resonate with everyone. There are some great systems out there, but ultimately how you run your life and business is completely up to you! Take the parts that you learn, find out if they resonate with you and then start doing things your way. There really isn’t a right or wrong way to do it, just don’t give up.
Comparing yourself to others – don’t do it
This ties in with lesson #8 in some way because I think when we go on the journey of transforming our lives that we get caught up in seeing what others are doing, how they are doing it and get stuck in comparison mode when we note they are more successful. It’s totally okay to look up to someone as a role model, but it’s never beneficial to compare yourself to someone. Each one of us is on a different journey that began at different times in our lives.
Love yourself to create your dream. Love yourself enough to take a break. I remember the days where I was always going and in some ways, I still do this but I have learned to shut down the computer and to lay in bed watching a show or even take a bath. It’s so crucial for your mental health to go out of your house, have some fun and nourish yourself with the right kind of food, company, exercise, and downtime just for you. These means have boundaries in place for personal and business!
Life is too short – stop waiting
Stop waiting until 2016 or another day to start working towards your dream. If you keep planning and you keep waiting, odds are that your dream will never happen. Instead, start today. Define your dream, be clear on why you want this and then decide to act. You never really know what you are capable off until you start doing and if you want it bad enough, trust you me, it will happen. Don’t wait another minute to go after what you want.
I would love to hear from you the lessons you have learned in 2015!
10+ years ago I embarked on a path of personal development to move myself to a new life. I learned a lot about what I wanted in life, how I handle stress and the thoughts that were holding me back. I mulled through and became clear of my thoughts and acknowledged my values to align myself with who I am personally and professionally.
I am feverishly working on a little e-book to help you do the same.
If you are plagued with negative self-talk and lots of “I cant’s” and would like to work through some of this, then this e-book will absolutely be your tool to get your going.
One thing I can tell you is that the life you are living now has long been handed to you from childhood and life experiences, but you have the power to reclaim your life!
When I was in my 20’s I realized that I was destined to a miserable life always comparing myself to my own parents. For what? My parents were unable to raise me and I was brought up in the system aka foster care. I had to work through forgiveness but further, I needed to muddle through some of the negative self-talk and negative thinking I had embraced due to my circumstances.
I made the choice to step out of the shadows.
I am now a better parent. I have goals I actively move towards to and the flexibility to change when something doesn’t align well with my values.
It starts with YOU making the decision to follow your goals and dreams.
Chose to be positive, people will enjoy being in your company but the ultimate joy maybe that you are healthier.
This will not be an easy feat because you will absolutely come across a resistance.
Know you are not alone on this journey and that above else you are loved!
Check out my Rebels Guide to Inspired Action
A journal and planner to achieve your goals in 90 Days!