There are always lessons to be learned in life if you are open to recognizing them and most importantly if you are willing to listen.
My son Lennon has been changing people’s lives, inspiring them and motivating them into being more present, to not take anything for granted and also showing the shadow side of life is too short to be miserable.
When I tell people that, Lennon is my greatest teacher on how to do life, I am not joking.
The kid knows what he wants and he’s quite verbal about it too.
And what you may not know, if you’ve never heard about Lennon, read the blog posts or the book is that he survived his first 4 years of life, living with a potentially fatal rare genetic disorder. And since it was undiagnosed for some time, his brain took a little bit of a hit in the cognitive area – but don’t let that fool you.
He is often one of the smartest people in the circle. His wisdom is often leaving me speechless.
The other day he said:
You have to be ready at some point, so why not be ready now?
Sure, you could delay being ready but aren’t you just putting off the inevitable?
The moment you decide to go after what you want – your dreams, goals and a life that feels good – is the moment you are ready. You can, of course, keep talking yourself out of it but why? What’s the point?
- Start that business
- Write that Book
- Get healthy
Be ready now and stop waiting for one day.
It isn’t always about the things he said, although they are brilliant and yes I realize I may be a little bias, but the thought has crossed my mind that people needed to spend time with him and hear his story. He’d never go for it and I got to respect that. That, of course, doesn’t mean I won’t share life lessons along the way.
Like anytime I hear someone complain about how shitty life is or how miserable they are.
Because of the genetic disorder becoming unmanagable after his diagnosis, it was recommended that he has a liver transplant because while there is no cure, this can change his life for the better. And so that’s what we did but we couldn’t fathom the fact that he’d have 3 liver transplants between the ages 5-8 and that things were really tricky for a while. (You can read about his journey in Lennon Steps).
But here’s the thing, no matter how dicey things were, how painful everything was (physically or emotionally), he got up and did what he needed to do. That doesn’t mean he didn’t complain but it seemed he just knew what he needed to do in order to get home from the hospital or get back to school.
Or like now where he’s saving up for an XBOX One and he’s diligent about the chores that help him earn money.
And some days are hit or miss, but he’s never quit if it’s something he wants.
I think that’s an important lesson.
Don’t quit the life you want to have.
It takes dedication, commitment, and a willingness to go against the status quo. Even if it means people don’t like you or you don’t fit in.
Lennon isn’t worried about fitting in.
Lennon is worried about what video game he’s going to play.
So, don’t worry about fitting in, instead figure out what you are going to do next that you want to do and of course could have an impact on your life.
Worry (not really) about the important stuff. Get excited (Yes this) about it!
Choose to wake up with joy in your heart!
There aren’t many days I recall Lennon ever to be angry or grumpy (unless the pain was too much). That doesn’t mean he doesn’t get upset, it just doesn’t stick around long enough. I think he doesn’t know how to hold a grudge of any kind because he just is filled with joy and it shows.
There’s something very genuine about it and it always reminds me that you get to choose how you feel, how you engage, express yourself.
Choose to be angry, you’ll feel miserable and wonder when life will change.
Choose to feel and be joy, life looks different filled with gratitude and like an adventure.
What will you choose?
That idea…. that dream in your heart and in your head, is begging you to do something about it.
You wake up thinking about it… you go to sleep thinking about it and I am here to tell you that if you don’t do something about that, it will never go away.
And you know deep down that unless you get over your fear, it is never going to happen.
But you must decide whether you are going to listen to that fear or if you are stepping up and out and take action anyway.
It’s time to stop the bullshit stories you tell yourself of how you can’t and really dig deep into what is stopping you.
And if I was a betting person, I venture to say you are being held back because
- you don’t feel good enough
- you don’t’ feel smart enough
- you worry about what other people will think
- you worry about failure before you have even started
It’s all hogwash! These are all stories you have learned along the way, and really, they are no longer serving you, because
You are enough!
You are smart!
And really who cares what people think? 9 times out of 10 those people are afraid to take action, so how about you pave the way?
And failure… failure is a good thing… it’s allowing you to see what is or isn’t working and then revamp how you are going about it.
Those ideas that have been swirling in your head, they are yours for the taking. They come to you because you have something amazing to offer to this world.
Incredible gifts to share and how dare you to deny others from what you are so carefully hiding.
The pain of not taking action, of not doing that thing, ask you: Is it worth it?
Because I know you are aching to bring it to life.
- Time to stop hiding.
- Time to stop worrying about being enough.
- Time to stop worrying about whether people will like you or not!
It is time to start doing!
Overwhelm and Procrastination hit because confidence has decided to hide from you. There are so many things you want to be, do and have but you are finding yourself thinking, who the heck am I to do this or maybe you are surrounded by the inner critic of not being enough, feeling enough and many other fears that you may not be aware of.
I am not one to beat around the bush (as you can see) and I like to dig right in and get to the core of the situation. But first, we need some clarity.
So, I want you to think about a goal you have for the next 90 days, and answer the following questions:
- What is your vision for the next 90 days?
- Who do you want to become in those 90 days?
- What goal do you want to achieve in the next 90 days?
- Why do you want to achieve this goal?
To get from point A to point B, we need directions or we end up lost in the middle of nowhere. So now that you have answered those questions, let’s go a little deeper.
- How will having confidence help you achieve your goal?
- How is lack of confidence serving you right now? In other words, how is it stopping you?
- Who can you reach out to hold you accountable and support you?
Self-awareness is the magic pill of becoming who you want to be, doing what you want to do and have all that you desire.
So, take some time today and sit with those questions. Make a cup of tea or coffee and then answer those questions in a free writing atmosphere. Don’t hold back because you really want to tap into that core of who you are.
Having answers to your motivation aka the why and knowing who you want to become, will give you the GPS coordinates to get there.
Tell me in the comments one insight you have gained and come back tomorrow for day 2!
We all have experienced this at one point or another, the fear of missing out. But what you are really missing is happiness within yourself.
Social media is great but it certainly has its downsides because it traps us to check in and see how great everyone’s life is. But it doesn’t show the reality.
- We check into seeing where people are traveling to and feel jealous.
- We check and see how many dollars someone brought into their business and we feel envy.
- We check and see how people are ranting and raving and create drama, leaving us feeling better about ourselves.
But the truth is that we can’t find our happiness on social media, nor can we achieve our own success by constantly checking on what we may be missing.
And here is what’s happening when it comes to the fear of missing out:
You stop paying attention to life, your life, and your own happiness.
The moment you decide to focus on yourself, your own happiness, you make room for your own clarity of what you want, where you want to go and what you need as a person.
But you can use the fear of missing out on to your advantage.
It can be your motivation. Take notice of where you are feeling unhappy and decide to make a change.
Ask yourself: What do you want? Where do you want to go? What do you need (and I am not talking material things here)?
Engage in mindfulness. Being aware of your own thoughts and feelings. It’s the process of self-acceptance of where we are right here in this moment without judgment.
Notice your breathing, your feeling and the sensations in your body. Know that your feelings and thoughts don’t define who you are and use them as a pathway to free yourself from limiting thoughts and beliefs.
Practice gratitude. You already have so much and gratitude helps you acknowledge all that is and all that is to come.
Make this part of your morning or evening routine, or both even. Create a list of 10 things you are grateful for. This could mean the rain nourishing the earth, or that you have food in the pantry to cook. It doesn’t matter how big or small.
Focus on what you want to create. This took me some time to figure out because I was wasting so much time on social media. I made a list of all the things I wanted to do and create and then I took inspired action to make them happen.
Fear of missing out only rules your mind, if you allow it. Make a choice today to focus on your own lane and your own happiness.