Just over a week ago, I found out a young man I knew, committed suicide. It was just a month before that, that I went to see my favorite local band and which he was a part of. We talked about life, music and all things business during the break and I was so glad he was figuring out his world. This young man went to school with my eldest kiddo and it just hit a little bit closer to home.
A few times during the week, people have asked about seeing any signs of it. And truth be told, I don’t know. I didn’t see him every day and I am would venture to guess that people never thought he’d be the one.
But it made me push the pause button.
I paused my business. I didn’t blog and only send out a quick email to my list. I posted here and there on social media.
Instead, I focused on my new office space (there’ll be a post about it soon) and getting it all set up. I focused on my artwork, and man I have created a lot of things that never made it into the shop.
This entire past week, made me reflect on my own life and where I wanted to take my business. And as I was rummaging through crochet blankets, painting walls and setting up my new storage age for yarn, I realized how much I missed creating.
Now, I love helping, teaching and supporting people on their path because there’s nothing more exciting for me than seeing other people go after their passions. I love it when people go against the status quo and just do their thing.
And it reminded me that I too just need to keep doing my thing.
Death has a funny way of hitting pause and move you into a reflective state. And yet in the same week, we celebrated the 9-year anniversary of my youngest kiddo’s liver transplant.
Life is so incredibly fragile and precious.
Which is one of the MAIN reasons I do what I do because I know that one day you are here and the next you could be gone!
I know that what you do with your life matters to your heart and your soul.
I know that you are here to follow your passions, your ideas, and your intuition to create a life that feels absolutely incredibly amazing.
I also know there will always be a dark side and that sadness and even death are present every day.
But this is how you start living in the moment.
You get to decide what to do with your life.
You get to decide to follow your soul.
You get to decide what will make your life feel like as if it is the fireworks of the 4th of July.
And in hitting the pause button, I gained the clarity I needed for my life and business.
I pulled back on some projects (for now) and just focus on the things that light me up.
I get to do the things that excite me and that follow my intuition.
Do more of the things that feel good and less of the things that drag you down.
Don’t want to be on social media all day? Then don’t!
Don’t want to record podcasts and videos or even blog? Then don’t!
Want to create from that place deep within and that feels good, yes do that!
I am not saying don’t post on social media, write blog posts or record podcasts and videos. But don’t think you have to do them all.
And as we are starting into the holiday season and nearing the end of this year, it’s a good time to hit the pause button.
Reflect on what your year has been like, what areas of your life felt good and which ones didn’t. You can create the life you want, but sometimes taking a time out will help you realign your soul’s passion.
I don’t want you to wait for another second to decide what you will do with your life.
I don’t want you to wonder about the all the what if’s, you know the ones, the ones that are about failure and being wrong.
I want you to give yourself some pause, and decide what you will do with your life, starting today!
I started my first business in 2005 and have had a few that I either lost interest, simply because they didn’t give me the fulfillment I need every single day.
The challenge over the years became that I was creating all of these different things and kept them separate from my life depended on it.
Because conformity taught me that we can’t be and do all that we wanted and that we had to choose one thing.
And here I was trying to show that you can have the cake and eat it too but it became incredibly difficult to manage. What I hoped would be a piece of cake because a clusterfuck that I struggled to maintain some kind of sanity around.
And for someone who is preaching about forging your own path and doing all things your way, I was in completely out of alignment with my message and how I showed up every single day.
And here I am today with a new layout for my website because I can squish all that I love in one place and I no longer have to come up with content for a gazillion things, but rather just in once place sharing wisdom about life, business, art and whatever else I may want to talk about.
Why would this matter to you?
Since I decided to make changes in my business before the website change, I have been trying to figure out how I can best show you that you absolutely can have the life that you want, do the things that you love and you don’t have to sacrifice a single thing about you.
I am able to show you that all you need is clarity on what you want and where you want to go and then allow the pieces to fall into place.
This life… it’s a journey.
And as I am turning a year older tomorrow, I know that this past year has been about undoing and becoming in more than one way. And sometimes we can’t see that until someone points this out.
So how do you bring all the pieces together?
You write it out of course!
Write about in terms of one year, 5 years and even 25 years from now.
What does your perfect day look like? Who are you with? What have you been up to that brings you the most joy? What do you do for fun? What does that look like? What does that feel like? What passions have you been pursuing, either full-time or part-time?
Here’s an excerpt of what I wrote December 2016:
The date is December 31st, 2017 and I am so grateful and happy that our home feels so amazing and warm and cozy. I love that I wake up to my partner every morning and that we are literally achieving our goals to freedom to live on the road.
All of our debt is paid off and my partner is driving around town in his new truck. My Kia Soul is paid off and continues to bring me joy when I am driving it around town.
Our kids and animals are the epitomai of health and life truly is feeling awesome these days.
Our garden this year has produced so much goodness of zucchini, tomato, eggplant, oregano, basil and green peppers. I truly enjoyed working in my garden grow our own food.
I am so grateful and happy that I get to support amazing women in the Rebel Soul Connection helping them achieve their goals in life and that I have been able to grow my own support network in the process. It feels really amazing to have people in your life that not only listen to you but cheer you on as well.
I am so grateful and happy that I have written my first fiction novel and that I enjoyed the process so much that I cannot wait to write more books in the upcoming year following.
My artwork is selling with ease and it doesn’t take much effort to share my work and people love how I bring value to their life, showing them that anything is truly possible.
And here’s what happened during this year:
- I opened up the Rebel Soul Connection
- I grew our own vegetables
- Started playing soccer as a way to exercise
- Became a podcaster
- Started writing my fiction book (to be released in December)
- Started writing a self-help book (to be released in October)
- Merged all of my blogs and became a lifestyle blogger of sorts
- I share my coloring pages, artwork, and wisdom in one spot
- Made progress in our remodel starting with the kitchen
- Decluttered and purged through the house
- My partner has a new truck
- Teaming up with local hospital to share my coloring pages with parents
This is the power of writing it all down and having some clear goals on who you want to be, what you want to have and what you want to do.
Some of these I had no idea how they would unfold nor how they would come into our lives, but they did nonetheless.
And you can have the same undoing and becoming for yourself if you are willing to take a chance with yourself.
A quick search on my blog posts, I can see a handful of times I have told you to “should” something.
And it’s really a word that can feel incredibly heavy.
Seriously, it’s hard to know what you want when you are “shoulding” all over yourself.
Do you remember your parents telling “you should do x, y and z so you can _______”?
Or maybe “you should A, because _______”.
Or maybe even teachers, coaches and peers have given you a bunch of shoulds.
And let me tell you, it’s all a freaking set up.
It set’s you up for a life that isn’t yours to live. In fact, it creates a life on someone else’s terms. It seriously interferes with the heart of the matter:
Doing what you want by doing what you love!
For example, parents have told you that you should have good grades, so you can go to college, earning a degree chosen by your parents.
Or maybe your gym coach told you, that you should practice 5 days out of the week if you wanted to become a competitor. Now don’t get me wrong, becoming the best at something takes dedication and hard work and yes even practicing 5 days a week.
But if it’s a should and not something you want to do, it feels heavy.
A friend of mine is a writer and she believed that she “should’ be a coach. She believed that is what she had to do to reach her destination: To be a writer.
Should, just like doubt, kills dreams!
This is the kind of stuff that happens when you listen to other people and not your intuition.
Because of other people “shoulding” all over you, you will talk yourself out of it.
And it feels heavy because it doesn’t excite you or inspire you to show up.
The moment you let go of all the shoulds you will experience a sense of relief, a sense of freedom if you will. You will feel lighter because you are now willing to follow your intuition and your heart!
When was the last time you felt TOTALLY in sync with your intuition, love, sensuality, and sense of peace?
You might be feeling unloved, broken or stuck, right this very moment.
You probably have experienced life transitions and situations that have weighed on you.
When was the last time you put YOU FIRST and really took care of your body, mind, and spirit like THIS?
I know that I have been there with some big changes and hard decisions that were almost too big to handle.
I’m speaking about Self-Love, Self-Strong & Soulful Energy. In my interview, I’m sharing a bit of my PERSONAL journey. The one that doesn’t allow me to question my intuition ever again and the one that rattled me to my core. You hear me talk about it all the time, but never in this much detail than in the intimate interview with Michele – and it’s a conversation about life, love, and healing.
But I am not the only one! This summit has an amazing team of experts and every one of us is making a difference. You’ll meet over a dozen incredible life-thinkers and problem solvers who’ve come together at the request of my friend Michele Paiva, a licensed psychotherapist and coach who has taught and guided hundreds of people on every continent.
The Radical Sacred Life Summit: Awaken Intuition, Experience Love, Stop Anxiety begins April 30th and yes, it’s totally free but there are some incredibly amazing bonuses if you want to like a Certificate of Ascension!
Together, we want to help you to stop living a half-life of feeling bad about yourself, missing who you used to be instead of living a life so full of radical peacefulness, happiness, and bliss that you never stop pinching yourself!
JOIN US for this FREE ONLINE EVENT!
When I created my Colorful workbook, I purposely create the goal section with be, do and have goals. In the past, I would make lists and lists of goals and found myself incredibly overwhelmed. By breaking down my goals into Be, Do and Have, I am able to really tune in who I want to be, what I want to do and call in what I want to have.
Who I want to be:
- The best me every day
- A partner for life .. hint hint
- Successful Business Owner – doing it my way
- Speaker on Stage – put an application in for an opportunity! Big Scary Goal!
- Best Selling Author – working on a book now!
- Healthy and Fit – regular workouts, more water intake, regular movement
- An inspiration to 5,000+ women
- Be a Podcaster
- Be featured on elephant journal, Huffington post (again),
What do I want to do:
- Change the lives of 5,000+ women
- Travel to New York
- Travel to New Mexico
- See Bon Jovi in Concert
- Speak on Stage
- Write Books – I have several planned already
- Hike Often
- Go camping
- Read Books for Business & Personal Development
- Take the Citizenship test
- Give 10% of my income to organizations I believe in
- Run 6 Challenges
- Invest in my business through courses, coaching, and outsourcing
- Write guest posts
- Finish my color therapy course and holistic nutrition course
- Create art, lots and lots of art
- Work in a way that feels good to me
- Grow my own food
- Pay down debt
What I want to Have:
- A garden with vegetables we actually eat
- Remodeled Kitchen and Bathrooms
- New appliances
- A party for when I become a citizen
- A business I love that allows me to create
- Kia Soul in Purple with Teal Trim
- Freedom, Fun, and Joy
- Entrepreneurial Friends – worldwide. I already am well on the way.
Just looking at this list makes me feel really good and less overwhelming.
Every day I get to ask myself how I can experience more freedom, fun, and joy.
Every day I get to tune in on how to be the best me and how I want to show up in this world. Every day I am presented with new opportunities bringing me closer to it all.
What is your Be, Do and Have Goals in 2017? Share in the comments!