Are you stretched too thin with too many obligations in your week?
Do you find it challenging to make time for yourself?
Do you even know what would nurture you?
I released the Nurture Yourself Challenge in the Rebels Academy aka Rebel Soul Connection.
28 days of exploration and trying new things to help you figure out what activities nurture your soul and give you the much-needed downtime from the hustle and bustle.
The goal is that you find about 3-5 things that not only light you up but truly nurture your spirit, and incorporate them into your long-term self-care regimen.
Sometimes in the chaos of life when you there are more demands in the day than you can manage, it’s challenging to find time for yourself.
In this challenge, you will spend 10-30 minutes a day, trying something different. You may already be familiar with some of the activities and that’s okay but this is about the experience and nurturing yourself more than anything else.
- What would it mean to you to take a little time for yourself every day?
- How refreshed would you feel?
- How relaxed could you go into the day?
Something I learned over the years is that if I don’t take care of myself, who will? If I don’t prioritize myself and give me that respect, how can I expect other people to respect and honor me?
And I want you to ask yourself the same questions!
And the end of the 28-day Challenge, I hope that you have found a few things that you know will work for you to help you nourish and nurture yourself.
There is no right or wrong way to engage in self-care and there whatever practice works for someone else, it may not work for you.
Join the Rebels Academy today and start taking the Nurture Yourself Challenge!
I was laying in bed last night and thinking about my journey for the last 20 years and it made me think about the Law of Attraction and other facts. When I started my journey, I didn’t even know what the Law of Attraction meant and if you are ready to change your life, you may not know what it means either.
The Law of Attraction simply means that you will acquire and achieve, as well as be provided with that of which of you focus on. But when you are in the middle of chaos and ready to lose your own sanity, it can be more than challenging to believe that your life can be anything different than what it is right now.
And there can be a lot of confusion around the Law of Attraction because some may understand it as such that you want to win the lottery and you will then without a doubt win it. But that isn’t really how it works. I am no expert at the Law of Attraction, I am however an expert at overcoming adversity and difficult moments in my life. And truthfully, it still feels confusing at times.
And what I have learned over the years that yes your thoughts that you hold matter and the Law of Attraction is about positivity but what I find challenging is that there are still shit days and you need to allow shit days to exist. My journey has always been about being real during the good, bad and the chaos.
Why would I recommend this? Because during the struggle and the frustration we often receive the most clarity about what we want to achieve in our life. When we are open to being objective and have the ability to look at it we can clearly see what isn’t working and that some changes need to be made.
In addition, there’s the notion that just because you stay positive and focus on what you want that it will magically fall into your lap. Again this isn’t how any of it works. You are going to need to take action.
You can’t keep complaining about how shitty your life is when you want to improve your life. Instead, you want to get incredibly clear on what you want in your life, what that feels like when you achieve the life you want. This matters because you are going to need to set some goals, create new habits (such as stop complaining and embrace gratitude for what is) and decide what action would create the most impact right now in your life to move you forward to what you desire.
The moment you make a decision to either go back to school to improve your life financially or leave relationships behind because they drag you down is when your sanity will be questioned the most. It will ask you every single day: Do you really want this?
And it’s your job to say “Yes” every single day and keep showing up no matter how difficult it may be to delete this one friend you have been connected with for a seriously long time, to make the sacrifice to focus on your studies while perhaps missing out a little bit on your family time.
The ones that love you and support you, will get this and will not be jaded by this. They will cheer you on and encourage you to keep going no matter how bad the shit storm is going to be. Lean on them when you feel your sanity slipping, reach out for help when you don’t think you can go any longer.
The Law of Attraction can be confusing and I kinda get pissed off when people spew positivity only because I am sorry not every day is filled with rainbows, glitter, and sunshine. We need those days just as much as we need the good days.
What really matters is how we deal with them so we can keep out wits about it all. And this is where journaling can be super helpful and powerful. I journal to move forward and to let out all the crap that I may be holding on to. I never read them again because of this. It’s about releasing all the fears, doubts and frustration I am experiencing and then write about how I can course direct my path.
So how can you change your life while keeping your sanity?
- Know that this is a journey and that every experience has a purpose to learn and grow from.
- Get super clear on what you want your life to look and feel like.
- Journal (daily) to express how you feel, what’s frustrating you and ponder how you can move through this. You have the answer, you just need to trust yourself.
- Write about your vision every single day. It’s going to take your mind some time to believe that it is possible, especially if your experiences have shown you the opposite.
- Create goals that support what you want in your life and create an action plan.
- Create new habits that support you, your vision and your goals.
- Create a support network with people who support you unconditionally, and you already know who they are. Tell them what you are doing and how they can support you.
- People will think you are nuts and that your new life is possible.
- Stop complaining!
- Practice gratitude for what all the goodness in your life. You are breathing, that’s a good thing.
- Define the boundaries you need to create in your life to engage less in the negative space.
- Decide you are confident now, not later. You don’t need to achieve X in order to feel confident.
- Know that having an off day is not the same thing as living and breathing negativity.
- Read or listen to books and blogs about from people who have done what you are wanting to do.
- Invest in personal development through courses, coaches, and therapists. Again, tune into what feels good here. Not everyone wants a coach and not everyone needs a coach.
- Believe in yourself, your goals and that you can and without question will achieve the life you want.
- Take responsibility for your thoughts, feelings, and actions.
One of the things I realized early on is that I complained a lot about everything and I blamed my past for everything that was going on my life. No wonder I was frustrated and struggled to find my path for a really long time. But the moment I took responsibility and started my healing journey is the moment when things really started come together.No I didn’t have it all figured out, nor did I know what it looked like in the end, but you have to start somewhere if you are sick and tired of where you are.
Similar to motherhood or parenthood, forging your own path isn’t for the faint of heart.
You have to ask yourself if you want to keep living in a box or if you are with 100% certainty okay with going against the status quo.
I see this phenomenon all the time and you’ve seen it too. Here are some examples:
Orange is the New Black, 50 Shades of Grey and yes even with Twilight. And I totally could go on and on about this.
But you know it’s totally okay to not ever read a single Harry Potter book or watch a Lord of the Rings movie.
I think the fear of not being liked because you don’t have a molecule of interest in any of those things, maybe at times greater than we like to admit too. And I get it.
I drank because I thought it was cool to do and it helped me fit in, nevermind the fact I didn’t really like myself.
And here is my one single tip for you:
Turn down the noise.
Turn it all off, the people, the TV, the radio, the social media – everything that’s literally interfering in not only stepping who you are but being in that truth of your soul being.
Get the journal or a piece a paper and your pen and start writing what YOUR path looks like.
Write it all out. The work you do, the love you feel and with whom. The joys you are experiencing, the impact you are having – even just for yourself. The truth you stand for and the emotions that in intent to invoke within you and therefore the people around you.
And as you are getting super clear with who you are, what you are about and what this life means to you, know that your boundaries will be pushed, obstacles will rise and you’ll want to quit and squish yourself into that little box of conformity.
Stay in the room, feel the feelings, and keep forging your path ahead.
Here is what I know about myself:
I get ideas, follow them and they either get completed or put to the wayside, but I take action. And this has allowed me to learn a lot of skills over the years, from building websites, starting businesses, creating my own coloring books and much more.
I have learned to work from the inside out, that when I am okay with myself when I can look in the mirror and say “I love you” and when I stay consistent with my boundaries but more importantly with my vision, things just fall into place.
I am a big dreamer and visionary. I am also a creative and a rebel.
I want to do things in a way that feels really good to me, from the inside out. And for me, this had been the missing link for a lot of years. I tried to follow other people’s structure and systems only to realize it doesn’t work that way.
It wasn’t always this way because I was intimidated by other people’s presence and success and so I kept saying “one day I will”. And then I heard other people talk about their dreams and goals and they too said: “one day I will”.
But life is funny sometimes because it provides you with events and lessons and you soon realize that “one day” will actually never arrive with one exception “one day you will die!”
And then not so many moons ago, I wrote my vision for 2017 and in that vision, I wrote about making an impact to help people, to support them with their dreams and goals and to give them the tools and resources they could want and need to make it all happen.
The Rebels Academy a community of like-minded people, who have big dreams and goals, who may or may not be intuitive, quirky but they are rebels, creatives, and dreamers.
The courses, programs, and guides within the community are the framework for you to build on. There is no right or wrong way to create the life you want and forging your own path.
Surround yourself with people like you sometimes we need a little help from our friends along the way. We need our own cheerleaders and pep-talk squad to make it through those hard days where you wonder if any of it will actually pay off.
Your one day is today!
It truly is time to start doing what you have always been talking about and stop wasting time just waiting for one day to happen.
What is Rebel’s Academy?
Rebel’s Academy is a system of videos, fun-to-do activities and in-depth guides to help you overcome obstacles and go the distance.
The key to creating a lifestyle of ultimate freedom.
The Rebel Plus program includes The Complete Rebel’s Handbook and membership to the Rebel’s Academy online portal.
The portal contains all three Rebel’s Academy Lifestyle Business Tracks and access to 1:1 support, when you need it most.
Your membership doesn’t expire. You’ll even have access to future materials added to the Lifestyle Business Tracks at no extra charge.
Your materials, resources and supportive tribe of rebels will all be there, ready to stand beside you in your own Rebelution.
But there is more!
There are threads in your private hangout to set goals, share your struggle, office hours where I answer your questions, sharing your wins and getting feedback. I am going to support you, cheer you on and help you achieve your dreams.
There are prices and rewards to be given out for committing to your goal and taking action to get there.
Some rewards include:
- 1:1 Sessions with me
- Apparel and other gifts
- and whatever else I can come up with.
And I don’t know about you, but being rewarded for the work you put in feels pretty damn sweet to me.
Join the Rebels Academy and be the first one to know when the doors open and get in on the early-bird special!
You are one decision away!
Here’s what I know to be true:
I know this because I’ve followed other people’s system for a really long time, only to find myself frustrated.
My vision and personal mission are to give you the tools, guides, and resources to get started and to support you with daily check-ins and monthly coaching calls to answer questions and help you through the challenging days.
Everyone’s journey is different, and we all want to get there and often want to do it alone. But the hidden truth is that a community raises your confidence, supports you during the days you want to give – and together we achieve great things.
It’s time to stop saying “one day” or “some day”.
It’s time to start saying “Today is the day, that I will…”
A Manifesto of Sorts
Here’s what it means to be a rebel soul:
Rebels are driven by their vision for the future
Rebels are relentless
Rebels take back the power from their captors
Rebels are strongest together
Rebels see the spark in others and help fan it into flame
Boundaries are what honors you – all of you.
For you to have healthy relationships with yourself and others – setting and maintaining those boundaries takes time and practice.
It means you are aware and know your limits.
Here are some examples of when you are struggling with healthy boundaries
- Saying yes when you want to say no
- Feeling guilty when you say no
- Going against your own values to please
- Not speaking up when someone impedes your boundary
- Not sharing thoughts & feelings or opinions when you have something to say
- Accepting sex and physical touch when you don’t want it
- Allowing others to say and do things that make you uncomfortable
All of those won’t feel good and impact your personal, emotional, mental and spiritual health. They leave you lost, frustrated, confused about who you are, afraid of taking action and even lack of control over your own life.
So how exactly can you begin to honor yourself?
- Mindset – Acknowledge that having boundaries are not only okay but they are healthy to have
- Identify and name your limits – think about times you didn’t feel so good about a situation or person. Include your values, belief system, and outlook and acknowledge what does feel good.
- Share with others about your boundaries. Have a conversation about what feel good and what you can’t tolerate. Share with them how they may have made you feel.
- Be willing to give yourself permission to feel fear and self-doubt and acknowledge that people around you may not respond well. And be willing to accept that it is okay. Maintaining your boundaries is connected to your self-respect.
- Self-Care is and should be your priority. Allow yourself to put you first. This includes seeking support when you have a hard time with boundaries.
It’s okay to not have it all figured out and take small steps. One Boundary, one person at a time.
Boundaries are invisible lines where you space begins and ends and meets another person space.
Boundaries are also physical and non-physical in such that when someone steps too close to you and you become uncomfortable that someone crossed the line.
We all have our own comfort levels when it comes to space and what I often refer to as “the bubble”.
Boundaries are also feelings based on things we picked up over the years and were imprinted with on how we should respond to people in our world.
Boundaries are necessary!
This is an area I struggled with since I was 13, and probably even before then but looking back that is where crossing boundaries started to be more apparent.
I always felt I “should” do this or that to appease people because you have to be nice and say no, well you were left to feel guilty.
The moment I realized how untrue this is being the moment I could claim my own power and align myself in such a way that if it feels like I should, then well I probably shouldn’t.
2 years ago, I did an interview with Lift Magazine for Single Mums, and even now it’s quite clear that boundaries are always a struggle. We need to really get clear on our boundaries.
I rely heavily on my intuition, that gut feeling that tells me yay or nay and it’s so prevalent to listen to ourselves.
If you are overwhelmed with should and guilt, it’s time to look at how you can claim back you, your time and a life that allows you to feel good.
But how do you know where to start?
- Make a list of all the times a commitment or an interaction left you feeling uncomfortable.
- Make a list of all the times that you committed to something but you really didn’t want to do it but you felt guilty for not following through.
This isn’t about creating more guilt, but more of an awareness tool so you know what areas you would like to change in your life so you can create boundaries and honor yourself.
Now that you have those lists, ask yourself how you would like to respond and engage in the future. For instance, when the feeling of should come up, decline to commit or engage.
The guilty feeling will still be present but with practice, it will fade because you are taking care of who you are and don’t allow yourself to be overwhelmed and exhausted due to crossed boundaries. Allow yourself to feel the relief because you honored yourself and make yourself important enough to engage in your own self-care.